in vain

forgive me each and every word
that's died upon my tongue
the ones held fast behind my teeth
on which my heart's been hung

forgive me every sinful thought
for control is hard to grasp
and it seems that for each aberration
it's harder to win back

forgive my lack of discipline
my mind falters, as you see
and it often leads me places
where i truly should not be

forgive me for the things i want
but never let me have
forgive me for those things on which i think
but fail to act

forgive me my compassion
when i've used it as a shield
another prop to hide behind
for every sword they wield

forgive me for this thing i'm thinking
appealing as it is
life does not smile fondly on
a foot placed so amiss

i find it odd that though i plead for mercy
it won't help
for the sole forgiveness that i seek
is only from myself